Saturday, May 28, 2022

Men vs Women Sex Drive – How Do They Compare?

A woman sits down to write a letter to a magazineadvice column. Her husband is in the room next to her playing Call of Duty: Black Ops Cold War.Every so often she can hear him curse and shout, at which points she grits her teeth in anger.“He won’t have sex with me,” she writes, adding, “The few times we’ve had sex (and I can countthose on one hand), I’ve had to beg for it.” She’s hoping someone will be able to explainwhat happened to this guy. Today you’ll find out. The example we’ve just used is real. The womanclaimed in the letter that her husband had slept with her once in the last seven years. Justlike that, he stopped. When she asked him what went wrong, he told her “it just stopped working”,meaning his John Thomas. He explained to her that this is what happens to men in their fifties.She didn’t believe him, blaming herself and .

Her weight gain. In the last paragraph ofthe letter she wrote, “I’m isolated, bored, frustrated, lonely, rejected, unwanted, hurt,and angry. I’m sick of feeling like I’m selfish for wanting sex with my husband.”Part of the reply she got was, “It’s about your husband’s failings asa human being, about his self-hatred, about his ineptitude and his decline.”But what if he’d just lost his sex drive? Can that happen? Does it happen more to men thanwomen? Who has the strongest sex drive in nature in general? What do we really want sexually?Those are some questions we’ll answer today among many other fascinating things we’lldiscuss related to men and women wanting, or not wanting, to get it on. Butfirst of all, what is a sex drive. .

Another term for it is libido. You can’t measureit. It’s not an actual part of your brain. It’s just a thing we talk about in referenceto how much a person wants to have sex. All humans have these things called sex hormones,which regulate through biological processes our wanting for sex. If such hormones were absent orfor some reason depleted, we might lose our sex drive. For instance, certain drugs can affectthese hormones, such as some anti-depressants. But there’s more to the sex drive than chemicalreactions. There’s the psychological side, too, such as you feeling the need for sex becauseyou have become very attracted to someone. If a person really attracts you, yoursex drive might go into hyperdrive. Or, for a woman, her sex drive mightget into third gear right before she .

Ovulates – when the egg is released from herovary. That’s because her testosterone levels change during this stage of menstruation.This drive develops when we are very young, before we really understand sex at all. Then,when we go through puberty, it really gets going. Ask any teenage boy who’s had to do his ownlaundry for fear of what his mother may discover. Boys generally get very horny at around the ageof 15. This is the point in many boy’s life when even sitting on a vibrating bus can cause astir in his loins. Before this age, both boys and girls might show some kind of sexual interestin someone, but it can be vague. Still, one study showed that 25 percent of boys and girls as youngas 11 or 12 reported that they “think about sex.” But when they hit their teens, something changes.It’s in the early teens that many boys will start .

Having sexual fantasies. What was previouslya nascent and vague feeling about sex becomes something very much real. Only ten percent ofboys start masturbating at the age of 10, but by the time they are 11 or 12 it’s around half of allboys that partake in the odd five-knuckle shuffle. The vast majority of boys will slapthe salami once they get to 13 and 14, while hardly any girls at all will masturbatebefore they are 13. From 13 to 14, only about 20 percent of girls will masturbate. Theseare rough figures we found in the book, “Puberty and Adolescent Sexuality.” Butwe have to remember there are many factors as to when the sex drive develops and as towhen it is acted upon, such as our culture. Scientists tell us that when guys are aroundthat sometimes difficult age of 15 they are .

In the most hyper stage of horniness. This is dueto their raging testosterone levels. With females it’s very different, with their sex drive reallycoming into full swing sometime in their 30s. Just as a man’s libido might be in the firststages of waning, a woman’s can really get going. This, of course, can sometimes cause problems ina relationship. It’s akin to discovering chocolate mountain when your teeth have fallen out and yourappetite isn’t what it used to be. In short, men are fast starters and women but women catch up.But that doesn’t mean both men and women can’t be involved in a sexual relationship right up untiltheir 70s or even 80s. One study we found said, “Forty percent of adults aged 65 to 80are sexually active, and more than half, 54 percent, say sex is important to theirquality of life.” That’s not the kind of study .

Children and grandchildren like reading whenthinking about their parents and grandparents, but don’t think for a minute kids that theolder folks can’t wear out the bed springs. According to a paper written by researchers atManchester University’s School of Social Sciences, there are some “sexual survivors” who just don’tretire their sex organs. These are the folks that are still going at it in their 80s, and they areloving it. Still, these folks are in a minority. The paper said by the time we reach 85, onlyone in ten women are still interested in sex, but for men, it was a quarter of them.For men, though, their drive isn’t always represented by a phallus that can stand upstraight when it’s needed to go into battle. Luckily for them, there are drugs these days thatcan help the little fella spring back to life. .

But as we said, there are more than biologicalconcerns when it comes to sex drive. Plenty of women have hit stagnancy in the sexual realm inmiddle ages and found in later life when they met the right guy, their sex drive suddenlyflourished again. And the same goes for men. There are social elements, too, such as peoplethinking they are past it. Old folks might be stuck in a home for the elderly which is notexactly a sexy environment, but some older people might use their retirement to travel the worldwhere they find their sexuality explodes again. But what about in general? Do eithermen or women have a higher sex drive? You already know that young males have a strongersex drive than young females, but in the case of the married couple in the intro, they wereboth grown up. It seems in that circumstance, .

The woman had the stronger sex drive, but ifscience is correct, this is an anomaly. It’s also likely the man just didn’t find the woman sexuallyattractive anymore. He blamed his age, but was he secretly fantasizing about a younger woman?A man in his 50s wouldn’t usually just lose his sex drive. In fact, males aged from their lateteens to their 60s will think about sex on average once a day, although it’s not easy to measurethis, as you can understand. Still, men it’s said will fantasize about sex a lot more when theyare still young, but they’ll keep fantasizing until they hit their winter years. Yep, yourgrandfather will more than likely still look at young women and imagine getting it on with them.A social psychologist at Florida State University named Roy Baumeister has made a name forhimself studying the sex drive, as well as .

Writing myriad well-known books on other matterssuch as addiction. He researched the sex drive for a long time and after interviewing scores ofpeople he discovered that men get sexually turned on in a spontaneous sense much more than women.He said, “Men want sex more often than women at the start of a relationship, in the middle ofit, and after many years of it.” This goes for heterosexual men and homosexual men. He alsofound that men want a higher number of sexual relationships in their lives and they are moredown than women on average in having casual sex. Women focus more on havingmeaningful relationships, while men are generally more ok with havingone-night stands and things like that. We know this sounds like an old-fashioned stereotype,but this is what researchers have found out. .

It seems men are just more simple in regardto sex. They look at a woman and some chemical reactions go off in their heads and they wouldn’tmind jumping into bed with this woman. Women, on the other hand, will be aroused often onlywhen other environmental factors are involved. As another researcher put it, “Sexual desirein women is extremely sensitive to environment and context.” This social scientist wrote thebook, “The Social Organization of Sexuality: Sexual Practices in the United States.”In a purely evolutionary sense, a male might want to spread his seed to as manywomen as possible if they look like they could provide him some offspring and proliferatehis genes. But with women, it doesn’t make evolutionary sense to sleep with any old man.They will be looking for a suitable mate. .

As for masturbation, around two-thirdsof adult men, married or not, will carry on beating the beaver. More so, of course, ifthey’re not in a healthy sexual relationship. Still, they will usually knock the odd oneout on the sly even if they are with someone. On the other hand, only about 40 percent ofadult women report masturbating and if they do, they do it less often than men.Men also seek out sex more when it comes at a cost. The vast majority ofprostitution is men seeking women or other men, rather than women seeking another woman ora man. Even priests, who’ve taken a vow of celibacy, seek sex more than nuns seek sex.So, what is going on inside men and women? It’s hard to say, but one researcher atNorthwestern University tried to figure it out .

By conducting a sex study. She showed theparticipants a series of erotic movies while a device was attached to their genital areas tomeasure how turned on they were. The participants were also asked how aroused they felt.The straight guys in the study told the researchers that what moved them the most waswatching male to female sex but also female to female. Those devices told the researchersthis was very true. As for homosexual men, they were aroused by seeing male to male sex.The women in the study said they were the most aroused by watching male to female sex.Maybe they weren’t telling the truth, though, because the devices showed they were justas aroused watching men have sex with men and women having sex with women.One of the researchers concluded, .

“Men are very rigid and specific about who theybecome aroused by, who they want to have sex with, who they fall in love with.” He said womenare more open in general to having same-sex relationships, and while they might not do it,they have more of a capacity to do it. That’s why more women report being bisexual than men.In terms of making out with people willy-nilly, women who were interviewed showed that many thingsinfluenced who they would have sex with. If the person went to church mattered, but it didn’t withmen. With women, their friends had an effect on who they’d sleep with, but not so much with men.The study even said that education counted for something with women. The more educated a womanwas, the more up for experimenting she was, such as giving and receiving oral sex. Education didn’tseem to make any difference when it came to men. .

In all, the researchers said thatmen certainly seem to have a higher sex drive and they are less vulnerable tooutside factors when it comes to having sex. But is this just plain old-fashioned thinking?It wasn’t too long ago that women were expected to hide their sexual feelings and impulses.That might still be true in some cultures, but it seems that men do want more sex withmore women and it doesn’t have to involve lots of preceding chasing. Another researchersaid women like a story. They are more complex. An example is that a lot of those online appsthat tell a sexual story are dedicated to women. Women like a plot. Men are ok with a paragraph.One researcher explained it like this: “Women want to talk first, connectfirst, then have sex. For men, .

Sex is the connection. Sex is the language men useto express their tender loving vulnerable side. It is their language of intimacy.”Maybe some of you have started falling in love and said to yourself, “If she liked me,she’d sleep with me.” But maybe the woman thinks, “If he really liked me, he’d wait andlet this story flower into something more than a bedboard banging against the wall.”Even a woman’s orgasm is more complex. With guys, they are usually done within four minutes.That’s when they are grown up. When that guy who has the stiff socks has sex for the firsttime he’s more likely to last four seconds. But the average woman, young or old, would onaverage take 11 minutes to reach orgasm if she reaches it at all. In couples, men reported havingan organism during sex 75 percent of the time, .

But with women, it was more like 25 percent. Thefunny thing is, the men in the study said their partners reached orgasm 45 percent of the time.As for that couple in their 50s we talked about at the start, other studies have shown that it’sactually women who generally lose interest in sex first. Sure, the guy could have had some kindof erectile dysfunction, which can happen to men as they age, but it is possible his memberwould have worked in different circumstances. Citing another study, the BBC reported thatwomen were twice as likely to lose their sex drive when in a relationship, but this wasn’talways about biology. It was often a result of “a lack of emotional closeness.” This studywas undertaken by the British Medical journal and involved 5,000 men and 6,700 women.Of those people, 15 percent of the men said .

They’d lost all interest in sex for a periodof three months or more in the last year, but for women, it was 34 percent. Nonetheless,with men, the sex drive started faltering between the ages of 35 and 44, and with women,it was between the ages of 55 and 64. Again, though, just because the sexual flame hasdied it doesn’t mean the sex drive is gone for good. Various circumstances, such as hard work orkids or even boredom, play a part, but the drive would still be there if things were different.And if you think about what we’ve already said, if men’s sex drives are not as complex and theyare more willing to jump in bed with more people, they will likely be having more sex at an olderage than women. It’s likely that as time goes on, men will feel more of a need to spread their seedthan women will want to have sex for sex’s sake. .

Now you need to educate yourself some morewith “Why Do We Actually Have Sex.” Or, have a look at “Why Men Have to Wait and WomenDon't – Refractory Period (Sex Education).”

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