It's about being a woman you know um you can't be to me you can't be a wife if you're not you know what i'm saying like you can't be a good wife if you're not if you don't know what a woman is you know what i'm saying if you're not a whole woman if you don't know that you need to get rid of your ego if you don't.

Know what submission what submission really looks like right like that word you think you want to jump out of my skin like you know but it's a heart posture it's not even necessarily about like oh i have to submit to just you have to submit to a man and give your life and your thoughts and your ideas and your.

Body over that's not necessarily what it is it's about submitting to the ego submitting to yourself submitting to higher power submitting to your husband submitting to your family submitting to a common goal being able to open up your heart and be vulnerable you know what i'm saying a lot of women who get married and.

They're not open how can you be a wife and you're not open you know what i'm saying how can you be a woman and your heart is guarded so i would ask all those types of questions and then comes in because if you're open and if you're willing and you're able and you're submissive then you can learn you can do all of these.

Things you know what i'm saying because you're willing to become a wife you're willing to be the wife that you need to be in the help mate sorry i went on a tangent sorry guys that's what we need to hear i mean i don't think it should be a shortcut if that's how you would address her then i mean for sure yeah cause it's serious.

Right it's a serious it's a serious thing those are questions and if she's like i don't know then it's like rethink it there's no you know there's no rush if it's meant to be it's meant to be but like these are things that you really have to you know have to think through i would talk to her about intimacy and about her sexuality like all of this is.

Like very you know very important so now you i was going to ask you something else but since you mentioned that key word there intimacy i know we talked about that we did so this i think you said this has been an issue and you hear this from some of your.

Clients or some ladies who reached out to you yes about intimacy what what do you think is it a d in your opinion is it is intimacy uh is that is it about security or comfort like what what what's your thoughts on that as far as so.

It is it is it's not all about security and it's not all about comfort right we can't because i feel like when we say it's about comfort like some people say that a woman can't fully release or reach her peak until she trusts a man um you know she's willing to really like.

Open up and give her body away so to speak and take let herself go to those heights right that's a trust thing but i've also realized it's a personal thing as well right so like for me and for a lot of women that i have talked to and work with it's with them it has nothing to do with their husband or their you know their.

Partner or whatever right which a lot of men take it first you know take it kind of take it personal as they should they're man they're like wait a minute is it me but a lot of times it's women who are disconnected and people are going to hear me say this all the time because this is just what i'm on right.

They're disconnected from their feminine so for me there was like a mind body and soul disconnection you know like disconnect so i would never allow myself to go into certain spaces where i could be intimate right it made me uncomfortable i didn't like because you have to be vulnerable.

You have to be soft i didn't know how to do any of that stuff it was foreign to me you know because we're told that's what weak women you know yeah women are like that right right right like you're strong you're rigid you're leading and you're masculine and now you have to like be intimate with the man and soften.

Up and sex is complete but people are like oh but women have sex it's completely different being intimate makes you more more vulnerable right so if i'm with my guy and i curl up next to him and i want to like snuggle and stuff like that that kind of stuff was hard for me to do because i had to like soften myself.

Right like some women it's easier for them to open their legs and ask them to open up their hearts so there is a lot of problems with intimacy when it comes to women because they are disconnected from their core from their womb from their femininity and once you connect to that femininity.

It's a whole nother ballgame when it comes to to the intimacy and everything else that's all i'm gonna say i can't give away too much no i'm glad you said that because you you definitely hit it on the head there's a difference between just sex and intimacy oh for sure because.

You do i've encountered uh not a player i'm just saying i've encountered encountered women who don't who can't be or who are basically like i've never really been intimate like this i've never mm-hmm no it's just like.

You said basically just open your legs and just you know going about your business but in terms of really that i don't even want to call it the because it's not about seduction or anything like that it's just about the intimacy is just intimate it's not intimate has nothing to do with sex.

Really right you know what i mean it's just you know being with someone and just that you know the whole situation i told you about where i fell asleep yeah yeah yeah we're bringing it up today we bring that up today or no no no no we're not bringing it up but the fact that i got.

To bring up another time yeah you know just the fact that you're able as a man he's able to in the same thing you know it's not about disarming which a lot of us you know a lot right now a lot of players you know a lot of those who are you know they call toxic are able to disarm a woman to.

You know sexually i'm not saying that's basically where she's gonna be intimate to that point but you're able to whisper sweet nothings and disarm her via your tongue you know when i say speaking to do that but you a lot of us will realize for those.

Like myself who do i love intimacy i love right no it's more than just sex i i i love the the the talking the delay laying in her lap the hold and so on and so forth you know i'm saying it's it's all the rest of that stuff you're just the animal you know what i mean and you i think a lot of guys you realize that.

That when it's all said and done when you do participate in you know that type or you do conduct yourself in that way you do feel like an animal and it's not fulfilling it's not fulfilling you know what i'm saying you might as well be a one-man show if you know what i mean yeah it's meaningless and a lot of times it's meaningless right yes.

Absolutely so i'm glad yeah y'all heard what she said she she is on the head it's definitely something different and i from a man's perspective i can definitely say it's something and a lot of you guys who haven't experienced it something you guys may need to look into and work on and you know you could you.

Could definitely book a session with avery and she can explain it to you as well yeah it's like you know what it is jared it's about like especially for a woman um and just a person in general it's about also being able to sit with yourself right because intimate is about being like being present in the moment being with that person.

Whether it's you all sitting next to each other and we know we just had the nba finals right and your man's watching the tv and you're shopping online of course that you're shopping you're shopping online but it's a comfortable closeness right it's not like a like a toxic quiet or a negative you know you can't cut tension.

But you're just close you just feel good leaning into each other or then hand-holding in the conversations and everything like that but you cannot be truly be intimate with someone until you're intimate with yourself right and i don't necessarily mean self-pleasure but that could be one of them but i mean like learning to sit with yourself and.

Be with yourself correct it also comes with accountability right so like all of that just came it comes from that but if you feel like the need that you have to be around people you have to be on the go you have to do this you have to do that you don't even have the time in the mental capacity just to like sit and beat and that's where some of that.

Intimacy comes from you know it's just i don't need anybody else i just need us i just need this moment you know what i'm saying i just need us in this space whether we're sitting on the porch or we're sitting in the car riding around listening to music you know what i'm saying and just enjoying ourselves or phone conversation but yeah.

Intimacy is like something that's like it's fleeting um just like the human connection right these types of conversations a lot of stuff is fleeting but that's what we need to sustain and to have healthy relationships correct man i'm digging it like you that's one.

Thing i was just listening to something yesterday i'm glad you mentioned that also about many people not being comfortable i don't want to stay comfortable because i know you didn't hit on that but i think a lot of people really aren't comfortable with themselves in terms of actually time to think and.

Understand what it is that you like what it is that you want instead of always having to be around others as you said um to kind of dictate what it is that they should be doing right and even going out in public by yourself or just being able to spend time with.

Yourself is very important loving yourself right like how like if we were together how could i love you the way you need to be loved i don't love myself correct and how could i get on you and say you don't love me like this you don't love me like that when i don't even know.

How to show myself love let alone love you the way a man needs to be loved you know so they're so busy doing you know doing the most because nobody wants to sit with themselves nobody wants to face their demons because it's yeah it's an ugly grueling process but it's like everything you know your life is on the.

Other side of that right yeah i want to cover it with vices we want to treat ourselves by devices to cover it up so them